Jackie Baillie is to be investigated by Jim Dyer, Scottish Parliamentary Standards Commissioiner over suspected gangland dealings. It is rumoured that Baillie, MSP for Dumbarton has frozen an intergalactic spice trader by the name of Han Solo in carbonite over business dealings gone sour. Baillie has long been connected with the ‘Hutts of West Dumbartonshire’ and the latest accusations have come as no surprise to many inside the Scottish Labour fraternity.
An insider commented: “Jackie Baillie is a dangerous character, her connections to this insidious underworld element have long touted. It goes all the way back to her selection as a candidate. Originally, an articulate young advocate was the favourite to be nominated, but after he was visited by some Boba Fett character he hastily pulled out. If she really has frozen some poor so and so in carbonite then this could be the final straw. That’s just not cricket.”
Previous unsubstantiated accusations against Baillie include the accusation that she solicited funds from an Emperor Palaptine for Wendy Alexander’s leadership campaign, breaking rules banning donations from outside the United Kingdom.
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